Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.

–Albert Einstein

I have not written in a while…ok, a long while.  It is not that I became lazy, it is that I fell into some sort of vortex that completely consumed me.  It was high energy involving work and life itself.  In fact, right now, I am not sure that I could claim to even be the same person that I was just last summer.  What happened?

Life happened.  I ran into unmovable objects.  They changed me.  That is what sometimes happen when an unstoppable force hits an immovable object.  The twists in the road have floored me.   This year is so incredible.  So different than any other that I have experienced.   As if we are given only so much time to figure out what we need to do to change.

This year has many of us all stumped.  The people I know have many difficulties that extend to work and most intimate personal life.  Every door closes, every path winds.

That doesn’t stop me, no, not even close.  I just keep going like the Ever Ready bunny.  Running into walls.  Running into people headlong. Never skipping a beat.  Every part of life affected.  Faint from stress.

So, love strikes me right in the middle of this cycle.  Not just some small attraction or affection. No, not me. This is killer, exotic, unbelievable love.  Impossible not to notice. And not simple.  Complex.  Complicated.  And painful.

When love strikes it is not intentional.  It just happens.  Like a giant wake up call.  Impossible not to notice.  Suddenly, here is this other person in real life, but bigger than life.  Not reasonable.  Not reasonable at all.

Why is love so painful?  It can be painful at the beginning, middle and end of a relationship.  Who knew, not me.  I thought I had more wisdom at this age.  But, no.  I know nothing of love.  And never did.  Never have.  Maybe never will.

Sex without love is meaningless.  But love without sex is even more strange.  Since, perhaps moderation is somewhere in between these two extremes.

So, here is my strange post, right in between all of these uplifting messages I like to write.

In times of great stress or adversity, it’s always best to keep busy, to plow your anger and your energy into something positive.

—Lee Iacoca, American Businessman, 1924 to present

Ok, the health of the United States and its sagging economy is getting to me and everyone I know.  After saying this online in one forum, I got resounding agreement from the group because, at this point, everyone has been affected in some way or another.  The stock market, the recession, the economy, job losses, lost investments, war, bankrupt states, mergers, sub-prime mortgages, social security, the health of the governments and schools.  Prices are going up, incomes going down.  Add this together and it spells stress.

Pick up a newspaper, listen to the radio, turn on the television and you are bombarded with dismal news and crisis.   It is no wonder that many people are in crisis, domestic violence is way up.  People have real tragedy from lost jobs, houses and retirement income that were once secure.

Being stressed out has become a national epidemic which has significant long term negative effects to our health.  Chronic stress, which we cannot avoid at this time in our life, has been linked to high blood pressure and heart disease and many other illnesses.

In times of life crisis, the first thing I do is go back to basics.  Eating right, getting enough sleep, and mandatory physical exercise everyday. It is not actually the stress that kills us, it is our reaction to stress that is the killer.

And, even more important than staying mentally and physically active, is keeping matters in perspective by staying focuses on the present moment.  By forming strategies to improve your situation in the present, you can master movement into a new position.   Acquiring a positive attitude is a mental habit that is far preferable to sitting around thinking about the worst case scenario and imagining yourself walking into that terrible scenario.

Generally, we can feel better about things when viewed from gratitude about the good things that we have in life, whatever they are. Not to be too obnoxious, but I can even build a case that the stress is a good thing because it can motivate us to make some long overdue changes to our life.  But the main thing is to build a habit of not sitting and stewing over the bad investment, poor choice of marriage partner, lost job, or sunken property value that is now afflicting us.

Reviewing the situation over and over again creates anxiety and increases the stress.  This reaction constitutes worry and anxiety which, over time, can negatively impact the immune system and weaken resistance to infection and the ability to recover.  Pretty soon sleep is affected or addictions invoked which only makes it worse.

The stress source itself is not the problem, it is the way we view it and keep it unresolved in our mind.

Are there compulsive behavior patterns that have emerged?  Mindless eating, drinking, smoking?  Buying things that you don’t really need but want?    It is really fantastic to notice what sometimes goes on automatic and become mindful and aware of it –and change for the better.   And, there are so many ways we can change for the better.

If you like, turn off the television and the radio in an effort to stop listening to the bad news distributed by the media.

Doing something simple like taking a walk or exercising can be a great help.  There are many other ways of focusing time and attention to productive and clarifying strategies.  Read.  Eat well balanced meals. Take some time for yourself.  Productive methods of mental management can calm us and move us mentally to a more positive attitude by taking our mind off our problems and learning something new.

They say that exercise increases the endorphin or “feel good” levels in your body while stress increases the cortisol or stress hormones which set about tearing metabolic systems down.  Do things that make you feel good.

Spend time with people who support you and love you can be a great way to take your mind off your problems.  Play. Talk.  Laugh.  Do something together.  Start celebrating the good things that life offers with the people who really matter to you.

Learn for yourself that you are not your job, your house or your finances.  You are a beautiful human being.

Everything should turn out fine in the end.  We come into this world alone and empty handed and we end up leaving just the same way.  The goal of life is to achieve happiness and joy despite all of the trials and tribulations that each of us encounters along the way.

You do not control the future and cannot predict what might happen next.  All you can do is steer the boat in the direction that you want to go and let the wind fill the sails to take you where you may want to go.

What an incredible turn of events we are experiencing now.  If you ask me, this scene is all about learning precisely what is important in life and putting the emphasis to those things.

On life’s journey faith is nourishment, virtuous deeds are a shelter, wisdom is the light by day and right mindfulness is the protection by night. If a man lives a pure life, nothing can destroy him.

—Siddhartha Gautama, the Buddha, 563-483 BCE

Now is a stressful time in the United States for many people as much of our infrastructure is caving in to to inevitable and necessary changes.   As a result, ordinary people are experiencing loss as companies and governmental agencies liquidate and fold, downsize and the like.  And the credit crisis hits just about everyone as home values plummet, stocks dip and salaries are lowered.

I guess I am bringing this up because I was really annoyed when someone I care about lost his job and the people at this company were pumping him for information about various people and situations in the company.  The co-workers were totally without any regard for this guy’s feelings of loss and abandonment.   These people were both rude and insensitive.   But, more than rude, they lacked the necessary empathy and awareness that this person was in a state of shock and despair.   They were not mindful of the situation of the other party.   Or didn’t care.  Believe me, my friend noticed how they acted and probably will never forget.   When we are in pain, even minor actions on the part of innocent parties can be amplified in the mind.

The way we perceive stress and how we react to our perception can determine how stress affects us physically, mentally and emotionally.  Stress reactions can be stimulated by anything that we believe to be a threat from verbal discussions, as with my friend, to jumping out of an airplane for fun.  The body is filled with stress hormones (like cortisol) and adrenaline which causes the heart to race along with many other reactions.  Constant stress can cause many (even, perhaps most) diseases including arthritis, multiple sclerosis, high blood pressure, stroke, gastrointestinal problems, diabetes, asthma, headaches, depression, insomnia, fatigue, eating disorders—and more.

The Buddha lumped a lot of this together and just called it suffering.

Meditation practices common in eastern philosophy are exactly what modern practitioners are teaching to decrease harmful behavior leading to diseases and emotional breakdown.  These ancient practices have been proven to reduce stress, improve health and increase happiness and compassion.

If my friend’s co-workers had been more mindful and compassionate, they never would have said half of the things that they did which caused so much pain.  They would have been mindful of the situation and not just thinking of themselves.  But, they have to stay in the moment, on purpose, paying attention to every nuance with total awareness.

Mindfulness involves stopping the habits that keep us stuck in the “reactivity” that causes suffering to others and to ourselves. The Tibetan Buddhist author Pena Chodron says that “the root of mindfulness is experiencing the itch as well as the urge to scratch, and then no acting it out.”

Staying in the moment is key.  Staying in the moment, not the past, not the future is what enables us to be able to pay attention to today, to what we are doing and experiencing what we are feeling in our bodies–what we think in our minds.   We can learn what we do by habit.  By ritual.  By rote.

When we pay attention to what we are thinking and doing we can break the cycle.  We can become conscious again.  This does not necessarily mean that we will be happy about the situation.  We may become aware of a pattern of negative thinking or unconscious behavior.  But, by first recognizing the pattern or activity, we can change it.

So, while you might want to run away to an ashram or retreat to learn Yoga and meditation to change your life, you don’t have to do that to gain the benefit of mindfulness.  Luckily there is great research going on in the medical community that identifies the effects of mindfulness on the body.  There is much for us to learn about how our mind affects biology.   But, there already have been hundreds of studies that can demonstrate that mindfulness practices can reduce the negative physical and emotional consequences of self induced stresses.  The result can be less pain and suffering from chronic disease, improved impulse control, better mental health, better communication and emotional regulation.

But, in the meantime, we all need to practice awareness, compassion and empathy by putting ourselves in our neighbor’s shoes before we speak a word.  A little compassion and support goes a long way.

“Self-observation brings man to the realization of the necessity of self-change. And in observing himself a man notices that self-observation itself brings about certain changes in his inner processes. He begins to understand that self-observation is an instrument of self-change, a means of awakening.”

George Gurdjieff  1877-1949

We work hard to get an education, to make a living and take care of our family.  We want to realize our full potential.  But, who has time?  Just as we take steps to move up the pyramid, things always seem to get complicated and slow us down or get us off track.

Abraham Maslow, himself, stated that “If you plan on being anything less than you are capable of being, you will probably be unhappy all the days of your life.”  This is because people at heart want to achieve and grow toward self-actualization.  When we stop growing, we get unhappy and unhealthy.

We strive to be the best person we can possibly be.  Most people really try hard to succeed in life, often exhausting themselves in the process.  To go beyond and above the basics to the top of Maslow’s pyramid is our goal.  Some people find success at life so difficult to achieve that they do not even try to grow beyond the needs of daily life.  Because to integrate the lessons of life that push us higher takes a great deal of courage and impeccability in with our actions and our words.

For most of us, every hour of our life is consumed to satisfying the basics and with the material issues.   Nevertheless, we have to run very fast to stay even in this non-forgiving economy.   Forging onward toward achieving the top of Maslow’s pyramid is a challenge, to say the least. Life continually provides us with situations to learn, to grow emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually.  Life knocks us on the side of the head and causes us to step back or rest.

Self-actualization means a complete understanding of who you are, a sense of completeness.  It means that we no matter what hand life deals, we have to take the time for self-examination and reflection.  When we take the time to do this evaluation, self-actualization is the result. Self-actualization is easily within reach.  We just need to take the time to let in a little light.

Life gives us choices each day but we only have a certain amount of time to drive toward growth.  The idea is to confront, examine and dissolve the negative characteristics that detract from our natural buoyancy.  By looking inside our mind we can see both good and evil impulses and thought patterns. We can hear the harsh critic of our ego self.  But our true self and being is not that ego self, not that noisy, scared, critical voice.  It is not necessarily the complex and dramatic weave of interrelationships and patterns that present themselves to the mind’s eye.  Each of these choices and life situations gives us the chance to free ourselves from that noisy voice to the calm observer who represents the grace, calm and dignity of our true self.

True magic happens when the individual gains that confidence and grace from self-actualization.  The magic is the magic and grace from the self.  By getting better acquainted with your true self, the one who has been there all along through all the ups and downs of life you can discover the answer to the most baffling puzzle in the universe:  who we are.  After discovering this hidden and wonderful part of yourself life becomes much better because you will understand the mysteries of life itself.

This is what mystics and alchemists talk about when they talk doing the “Great Work”.   Mastery over the great work gives you a command of your universe, which is yourself.

There is a great difference between mastery and ambition or achievement for one’s personal ego esteem needs or material gains.  While everyone has material needs, and having sufficient means or ability to take the personal time to grow is terrific, often material gain goes unchecked and some people will experience such significant abundance that it turns to greed or self indulgence.  The trouble with this type of success is that you can never become satisfied.  You can never reach a final goal.   Financial accumulation becomes another addiction with an unfillable void.  You keep rolling the stone of Sisyphus up the mountain and as soon as you get there it rolls down and you have to roll it up again.

True potential and self-actualization is the recognition that one has the ability to achieve anything we want and that the joy of this co-creatorship is the secret to Life Itself.  We have the innate ability to know everything inherently and to do anything we want in life yielding fruitfulness, abundance, peace and prosperity and bringing forth anything we need.  This is the grace of self actualization.

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.

—Albert Schweitzer, Theologian, musician, philosopher and physician, 1875-1965

Some people are born to greatness.  Most of us have to work at it.  If you suspect that you fall into the latter category, as most of us do, you can hit the mark faster if you have some idea of what success is and how you can get there.

If you assume that an ideal strategy for planning a life rich in achievement is to merely find an achiever and then do everything just the same, you would be right.

Almost.  The problem is that success is defined individually.  It doesn’t come in “one size fits all.”  Many people think that they want the kind of success that they perceive others to have, without really understanding what it is or what it took to get it.

As much as it seems an interesting prospect, we can’t slip out of our own life and into the life of another, no matter how attractive or successful it might seem.  And there are still more practical impediments to morphing yourself into an achiever you admire.  In a fast paced world, most people at the top are behind closed doors or hidden behind a wall of agents, and intermediaries.  Not only is it nearly impossible to gain access to a celebrity or a mover and shaker, but it is likely that the person will not have the time to teach you all that he or she has learned in a lifetime, even if it could be articulated.

Even without direct access and endless time freely given, achievers have a lot to teach us.  One way to learn the secrets of success is to study achievers from the past. We can learn from them because these people hold still within the pages of books.

Historical perspective has validated the timelessness of their insights and brilliant outcome of their ideas and work.  And commentaries on their lives can add depth and insight to enrich our understanding of their essential nature.

As Edison learned from the pages of his books, and as I have myself learned from Edison and others like him, the real keys to success are passion and commitment.  This is where we start.

To be successful, perhaps we should first understand what success really is and how to recognize it when you have it in your grip.  So many people are changing jobs or even changing careers incessantly, I have started to call it “looking for utopia”.  When the key to success is so simple and right in front of our eyes.  Success is defined as simply as completing something to your satisfaction.  No more.  No less.   Just doing your best.

If you deliberately set a goal, achieve it, and are happy with the outcome, you are successful and should congratulate yourself.  Of course, there are various scales for successes, both large and small. Certainly, while finally getting a cluttered desk in order is a success, but let’s face it, it’s a small one.  Landing on Mars or curing cancer, however, would be bigger and some might argue, more worthy.  But that’s the point.  You decide.

If you are an achiever, you would set your sights fairly high.   But you still, simply, do your best.  I have been studying with great interest what the formula for so much professional and financial success that comes from the engineers and business people alike who live and work in Silicon Valley.  What I discovered is that the most stunning successes begins with passion.

Passion is an intense desire, wanting something so badly that you’ll do whatever it takes to get it.  It is the most positive of all obsessions … especially when it’s shared.  It literally creates the corporate culture and bonds like-minded people together.  Although passion is enormously helpful for getting started, it’s not entirely the key to success.  Nor is it enough to get you there.

Couple passion with commitment, and now you’ve got lift-off.  As in Edison’s lab, passion is the small spark that ignites a team to action, but commitment is the fuel that keeps the flames alive.

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”

—John Quincy Adams

Get out there and do what makes your heart sing.  Anything that interests you and provides a service to mankind will fit the bill.  It is a lifetime calling and best to choose something that fits your disposition.

• Some people feel a spiritual calling and help to establish the character and morality of society. They exemplify goodness and great purity of spirit and want to assist others in becoming more.
• Others become leaders–of societies, countries or businesses.  These individuals tend to exhibit qualities of courage, fearlessness and ingenuity as they face changing conditions and lead people through to their better welfare and prosperity.
• Providers and servers supply all of the goods and services from food to entertainment that society needs to support commerce and the social and economic welfare of the people.

All of these functions are needed to have our incredible human family.  In every area there is a chance to become dedicated by performing your work carefully and selflessly.  And in each area you can have a lifetime of success and adventure by continually seeking improvement in your methods and effectiveness.

Working for change or improvement is the criteria for making positive change, whether you are an athlete like Michael Phelps, who broke the world record in swimming and taking the most Olympic medals ever–or someone creative like J.K. Rowling, who managed to write the most amazing new classic book series while working full time and a single parent.  There is room for inspired service in every field of endeavor.

It takes dedication, confidence and perseverance.   Very few pessimists become leaders, it takes consistency and optimism.  You have to believe that success is possible and lead people into a collective vision of how that is possible and help them to believe in their own ability to “make a difference.”  Keeping a genuine and good sense of humor will help because people work better when they’re happy.

By being a positive example, the hardness of ego is overcome and replaced with the new softness from the encounter from inspiring and motivating other people.  No matter what you are doing, this quality is endearing and your influence is real and palpable. No words are necessary, because you lead by example.  Knowledge of the task at hand or situation is honest and supportive. Leading by example in accordance with the core values of  the group will build the trust and confidence of the people with whom you work.

Leaders take a challenge well.  The scope of the task is not a deterrent, because leaders are not daunted.  Leaders break down problems into component parts and work on the pieces until the job is done. Being accountable for their own actions and holding others accountable is the role that a leader plays.

Exhibiting a clear sense of purpose with goals, focus, enthusiasm, and commitment is key to success.  The leader has to show drive and initiative to influence because people always look at the results-orientation that comes from directing every action towards the agreed upon result, prioritizing activities to spend time on the activities that produce the best result.

Leaders will involve the people who are stakeholders, seeking their views, listening actively to what they have to say and representing these views honestly.  A leader cooperates with everyone.  Keeping people informed is an important function of leadership because no one likes to be left out.

Cooperation is an ability to work well with others while exhibiting good interpersonal skills. It is good to develop clarity on what is expected in advance, correct small variations before they turn into tragedies, and provide feedback on progress along the way.  Every person is unique and showing empathy and tolerance and dealing with their problems and issues fairly.  Thanking, acknowledging and recognizing people for their contributions and performance makes a good leader into a great leader.

Charisma is common in a leader. How do they develop charisma? What is it?  Why do some have it and others fall flat?  Self knowledge and self confidence are key to leadership. The ability to take responsibility and “lead” one’s own self precedes the ability to lead others. The best leader does not take the circumstances too seriously and keeps a sense of humor.  This quality is extremely  attractive.   This distinct ability is converted into leverage to motivate.   Dedication to a role or service builds trust that this preoccupation consumes much of leaders’ life - the level of commitment moves from merely service to a cause.  This stickiness of leadership translates into the ability to encourage and nurture those that respond to the cause.  Leaders delegate in such a way as people will grow.

Adaptability is critical as nothing stays the same.  Weighing alternatives, considering both short and long-term effects and then being resolute in decisions.  This resolute-ness builds trust.  People want to be with someone who has integrity, ethics and responsibility.

Lastly, listening and understanding what others say, rather than listening to how they say things gives this leader the empathy to attract a large and motivated group.

“I’m going to be a superstar musician, kill myself, and go out in a flame of glory. I want to be rich and famous and kill myself like Jimi Hendrix.”

- Kurt Cobain (1967-1994)

In the above quote by Kurt Cobain, he seems pleased with his decision to go out with a bang.  And he did just that.   Could anyone have done anything to bring him from the brink of self destruction?

If only it were so easy to just change our mind and instantly transform from the practical dilemma of mental problems.  Unfortunately, it is not so easy.  Mental illnesses of every sort are unpredictable.  Individuals can alternate between episodes of depression, anxiety, mania, psychosis and wellness.  In the middle of an episode the individual cannot comprehend the problem and indeed believes the problem is the friend or family member.  The person can be very rational in many ways, but not in others.   Anyone around this person finds themselves hurt, dazed, bewildered and confused.

Families perpetuate the cycle of mental disturbances.  While this phenomenon belies the discussion of nature and nurture, both genetic disposition and parenting are factors in the family.  Parents with, shall we say, a different construct of reality, do not usually make the best role models.  Child abuse is rampant in our world, with physical, emotional and sexual abuse among the leading causes of mental illness later in life.

Still, the makeup of a disordered mind is complex.  Everyone comes to this world with a distinct personality and temperament.  These seems to be resident at birth.  There can be organic, and genetic susceptibility and differences between the nervous systems of individuals in our biology.  The brain organization is a significant factor, coupled with the belief system of the individual.  So, as the individual experiences emotion that affect their beliefs, gradually the mind is conditioned to allow the impulses to affect his whole being.

At this point, the mind has taken over and is in the driver’s seat of the soul or the conscious being.  The content of the thinking is on some kind of autopilot.  The individual is at the effect of the thinking and it is negative–blame, shame, distress.  A crisis. A journey with no destination.

A diagnosis of a mental disorder is deeply stigmatizing but should not be.  Depression, anxiety and psychosis are extremely common and often hidden from view from co-workers and friends.  The individuals have their own reality and cannot understand why other people do not see things the way they do.

It is futile to attempt to change someone else or even arguing with them, all we can do is accept that their personal version of life is realistic and valid.  The nature of thought is so personal that it is impossible to try to get a glimpse inside.  Therapists spend years with behavior modification techniques to coax the dysfunctional personality to identify and correct situations where they might lack the empathy to evoke a proper response.

Each of these situations is a lesson in coping for friends and family of the one who suffers.  Anger, abuse, laziness and anxiety attacks may be part of a regular landscape of irregular behavior.

And what about the real problems of the past that may be the cause of the pain?  The only way to dissolve them is to understand them and let them go.  The destructive effects of these thoughts are not real, they are just a function of our consciousness. These thoughts can be kept in perspective.  Ideally, dismissed.

It takes a real conscious effort to come back from the illusions that the psychotic mind has created.

Each and every situation is an opportunity to transform.  There is a fine line between psychosis and a spiritual transformation.  Serenity has to take the place of anxiety as an epiphany takes place.  Perhaps the changes that certain people need to make are so significant that it takes this exaggerated of a personal crisis to gain the sensitivity to search for positive feelings in life.

Mental functionality disintegrates when the life within is in so much personal pain that the soul vacates the premises.  Then, a primary disconnect ensues that separates or divides the person into so many fragments that have been left in the past and covered with pain and denial.

I believe that all people with personality pathology or mental disorders have the capacity to reclaim their wholeness and can transform with sufficient desire.

Thinking is a gift and each of us has the ability to focus on the things that can bring happiness and peace to our self and those around us.  It is our thinking, not the circumstance, that determines how we feel.  Happiness lies in the peacefulness of the present moment, not in the nightmare of jumbled thoughts that the mind is capable of producing.

Staying in the present can produce the level of concentration that enables us to be productive and supportive members of the human race.  When we experience the present moment, the natural state of bliss which is the birthright of all humankind is restored.

It is only through your conscious mind that you can reach the subconscious.  Your conscious mind is the porter at the door, the watchman at the gate.  It is to the conscious mind that the subconscious looks for all its impressions.

—Robert Collier, American Author, 1885-1950

The main purpose of the subconscious mind is to preserve the well-being of the individual.  It supervises the body–breathing, circulation, digestion, muscles and the like.  It keeps track of the wellspring of thoughts that enter our consciousness as a storehouse of knowledge.

So, images of events in our lives are stored here.  Difficult situations that we may have faced are here, hidden from view. Knowing our self means looking inside to free and eliminate the pain that may linger, no matter how hidden, so that thought forms and emotions do not surface from the lower self to poison life and loved ones.

Suppression of emotions tends to create a mask of the real self.  This mask creates self-deception as this false layer convinces the person to believe in his / purity of motive.  The actual root of the condition or thought pattern actually sinks into the subconscious mind where it ferments and grows to create ugly forms that cannot be easily eliminated because the person is basicly unaware of them.  Facing your shortcomings is the way to go since avoidance is the greatest mistake we can make yielding more trouble and conflict.

Searching for the truth within takes time.  Meditation or therapy are both perfect for this purpose.  Purification of the lower self can bring truth and enlightenment.  A new spark of life is born as the mind can focus its power of concentration on external activities rather than dwelling on the safety of self.

Confidence gets a boost as the power of concentration is activated.  Things that were once harder to do become effortless.  Higher level thinking comes into play.

When the subconscious mind is free of distraction, they say it can be influenced by auto-suggestion.  The conscious mind merely needs to root an idea in the subconscious mind through repetition of thought.   We entertain a belief and then the belief enters our subconscious mind.

We can tune our mind with constructive thinking and visualization.  And we can bring others into this happy habit to create a result that supports a group.   This is how leaders operate.

The subconscious mind needs to be tended like a garden.  Meticulous care and feeding will result in a cleaner, purer spirit within.  Attending to thoughts that cultivate the mind with health, music, art, science, supporting people with progress will produce a connected, intelligent and responsible individual.  Someone like this is the type of person who everyone wants to know.

You cannot make yourself feel something that you do not feel, but you can make yourself do right in spite of your feelings.

—Pearl S. Buck

The path of self transformation is the purpose of this life.  Situations are constantly presenting themselves to us as opportunities to learn and grow.

Around you, your world revolves. Your character draws people, thoughts and opportunities to you. You, with your desires and abilities can accomplish anything you set your mind to.  Your experiences are determined by your mental attitude and you will draw people with similar attitudes to you.  The better able we are to synchronize our mind with universal principals, the more we are able to accomplish, have, do and be without any limitations or lack.

The subconscious mind is powerful as it has the ability to remember absolutely everything, even after the conscious mind has long forgotten or suppressed the memory.  Evidently, even memories from our ancestors are carried in our genes and DNA to surface as responses to fragile situations, like the fight-or-flight instinct.

Our natural state of being is well-being.  Children are born into the world free of cares and pain.

But, life deals us a blow every once and a while.  Each and every mind will handle these difficulties its own way.  If the mind chooses to harbor anger and anxiety over each and every incident, these negative impulses are transmitted to the subconscious mind. The subconscious mind is keeping a record of every negative incident and forming a dossier of harm and injury–it has become a habit.  The repetitive pattern of storing anger and releasing anger to others is a difficult pattern to break and is the basis for much dysfunction and unhappiness.

If the individual become more aware of how this function is operating, he or she can break the cycle because thoughts are the cause and the angry conditions are the effects.  Over time and with diligence and patience, these habitual thought patterns can be erased and replaced with better feeling thoughts that can remove the accumulations of negativity and distress.

All of the negative patterns function in this way:  anger, jealousy, fear, lust and the like.  First, the pattern is a feeling, then an unconscious thought process, then a conscious thought, then an action.

By simply surfacing the thinking, the more logic and thus balance we can add to the thoughts and emotions of a conscious mind. Then, the better is our understanding, awareness and concept of self.  The general knowledge of where you are and how you feel leads to greater consciousness.  Staying in the present moment, not the past or future.  Aware.  Prescient.

Why not go there?  We can make use of our own creative powers to exhibit better expressions of mastery to make the world a better place to live.

Wisdom comes when the proper use of self awareness and gratitude for the gift that is life brings about harmony, grace, happiness, health and giving. Through mental and spiritual awakening, a path is opened to the light which gives life more purpose and meaning because the resistance to our natural well-being is removed.  As we rise in mental capacity attuning the mind to universal consciousness, there is a corresponding increase in intellect, the power of our feelings, the ability to manifest our will, and power to give freely of ourselves. The outward manifestation of this state is abundance and peace of mind.

Your true traveler finds boredom rather agreeable than painful.  It is the symbol of his liberty - his excessive freedom.  He accepts his boredom, when it comes, not merely philosophically, but almost with pleasure.

—Aldous Huxley

My mom used to tell me that only boring people get bored.  She was always quick to list innumerable things that I could do if I ever found myself in that state of mind.  Now I understand quite a bit more about why boredom is actually a high state of mind, considering the negative alternatives.  Gangs form when kids have nothing that captures the mind and then produces enough to do.  With insufficient supervision, these young gang members come up with numerous devious ideas of how to stay active and connected to the gang.

When bored, we are bored with our self.  Even though there might be significant choices on how to spend our time, nothing engages our attention.  In this way, it is a little like the state of depression.

Laziness lives here in boredom–it is a state manifesting stagnation, paralysis and apathy even though there are plenty of productive things to do.  Laziness stops our life force and the energy become more inert until you cannot move. It becomes a type of psychic toxicity from stagnation of repressed feelings.

On the other hand, boredom can be seen as a high state, as it is above most of the totally negative emotions such as anger, hate or envy.  In boredom, a person who has a tendency to be dysthymic can choose to proceed further down the emotional scales using personal anxiety, guilt and shame leading to more distress and suffering….or to rejuvenate the self with engaging and productive thinking and activity –the key to health.

It has not been clear to me why so many people choose to focus their thoughts on a pessimistic outlook and live in an illusive dream state of anxiety and pain as a primary outlook.  The person suffers from a type of amnesia losing awareness of self and his or her real identity.  And worse, over time these symptoms which are at first imagined by the mind can turn into real physical and mental sickness as an expression of the emotional turmoil inside. The fear is not real, just an illusion.

The mind has turned into habituation of patterns which must somehow comfort the individual who is essentially happiest in this quagmire of negativity.  Negativity has taken a devastating grip on life.  A huge effort is required to overcome resistance to abandon this darkness even though the light is waiting patiently for the person to see that everything is to gain by turning in that direction.

In the Pathwork Method book written by Eva Pierrakos and Donovan Thesenga called Fear No Evil, the idea is proposed that individuals who focus on the lower self experience personal pain as joy and pleasure due to past conditioning.   The dark force has taken the soul who deliberately chooses a course of denial, spite and hate even at the price of suffering.   Negative intentionality is the deliberate desire to hold onto destructive, cruel and brutal attitudes.  Early in life, the individual was somehow thwarted from attaining whatever he or she desired and instead began to intentionally negate all the good things in life and became envious and spiteful of those who could achieve them.

So, it is here, on the brink of boredom, that we can sink into the amplification of neurotic solutions, disappointments and fears or move the mind into hope and manifest new realities that can result in self fulfillment and achievements that bring out the best potential in us.

The spiritual self with all the joy, love and light is right behind the sadness and pain of a lifetime of avoided feelings.  But, it is a journey through feeling the pain, understanding it and thus dissolving it that produces the hope, security, love and companionship that all humans seek.

To be human is to experience. To be human is to transform our flawed and imperfect emotions by resolving to change and then to proceed diligently on the work of self realization and self transformation.   The journey is what we are here to do.  To find that pearl of great price.